Photo by  Dawid Zawiła  on  Unsplash

1. Keep anger out of your voice

A strong-willed child tends to challenge you and defend themselves. The issue gets lost as they fight with the ‘fight’ in you. Speak calmly and quietly.

2. Use ‘yes’ whenever you can, and ‘no’ sparingly

Many of our children’s requests can be given a ‘yes’, if we take the time to rephrase our response. When your child asks at 5pm, "Can I have Timothy over to play?", the usual answer would be, "No, look at the time!" However, if we respond with something that shows we are thinking about their needs, the child feels respected but realises certain requirements are necessary for such an activity to take place. "It would be great to have Timothy around to play. Let’s plan what day would be suitable and invite him over."

3. Give them the chance to convince you of a request

Every now and then give your child the privilege of going away and working out a convincing argument about why they should be allowed to do something. Let them spend their energy on good reasons why you should agree to their request.

If their reasons are good, and they put them politely, agree with them. It is great for them to learn that they can achieve very positive results from good request-making.